Golden Rule=Crap

I don't even know where to begin. It seems like everything's an end these days.

So let me start with this: my sister made it onto her school's cheerleading team. This sentence is very simple, is it not? Seemingly innocent. Oh, but it isn't.

Because along with this came a whirlwind of woes. She goes to practice for hours on end all day. She's taking courses in the summer so she is always doing homework. If there's one thing you need to understand about my sister, it is that she is a complete workaholic. She is capable of sitting for an entire day in front of a book and doing math problems. I swear she doesn't know what the word "fun" means. Most unusual for a teenager. Unheard of.

My family had been planning a trip to my birthplace for years, and of course, I was excited about it. I'm turning eighteen this summer, and we were originally supposed to take a weeklong vacation so that I could see the hospital in which I was born and whatnot. Well, it also happens that cheerleading camp has been arranged in intervals which makes this vacation impossible. Normal parents would say, "Oh, let's just go without her. This is your eighteenth birthday after all, and we have been thinking about going there for years." But no, my parents decided that they wouldn't leave without her, so thus, we are not going. Anywhere.

Do you know what that says to me? That is telling me that I am not important, or at least less important that my sister and her stupid cheerleading. And ever since she was born, that's how I've felt: inferior. It's just like when you give a child a new toy--they immediately begin playing with it and ignoring all the other ones. And as if that wasn't enough, they only pay attention to me when I'm doing something wrong. I feel like I'm tiptoeing through a mine-field.

And you know what else? I don't get any respect. I run around all day, packing my sister's lunch because she's too busy to do it herself and because I think that being nice to her will make her be nice to me. Like the "Golden Rule" says. Well, you know what? The "Golden Rule" is a sodding pile of crap. Whoever made it up must've been living in some sort of imaginary uptopia because my sister merely complains about how I didn't put enough mayonnaise on her sandwich or that she doesn't like yellow mustard. Not a word of thanks. And even if she does say thank you, she doesn't mean it.

It's the same with the word "sorry." She steals my clothes out of my closet all the time, claiming that she has "nothing to wear," which we both know is absolutely untrue. She has tons of clothes, and as she frequently informs me that my clothes are "not stylish," I don't understand why she would steal them from me. And every time I catch her doing this, I yell at her, and she says, "Sorry." Which, of course, has lost it's entire meaning by this point. She might as well say, "Lawn clippings" or "Ostrich." They are all equally meaningless. And what's more, my parents never do anything about this. They just laugh because, oh, it's just the most hilarious thing ever and she's their precious little angel that can do no wrong. Ha. She could probably cleave someone's head off with a hatchet right in front of their eyes and they wouldn't believe she did it.

I don't really know what it is that I'm trying to say. I can't even think straight, I'm so...angry. Frustrated. Humiliated. Cheated. And I feel like I'm always being punished for everything. Everyone's too busy caring about my sister. My parents are too busy hating each other.

Sometimes I wish I'd never been born at all.